Tell me, please

[pegkerr]

I've been asked to take stock of my resources, and in particular, to note all the things I am doing right. Not in the too distant past (yes, I wrote some good books, but that was several years ago). I'm talking about, within the past year.

Friends list, please tell me the things I am doing right. Lurkers, that includes you.

Right now, I need to hear that rather desperately.

Comments

[stinaleigh.livejournal.com]

You are a loving, supportive mother.

You are an adventurous cook who likes trying new things in spite of opposition.

You are a loving wife while faced with many external pressures.

You are a writer. Even if you do not think so, you write every day, here at LJ and at work.

You are a fabulous friend doing whatever you can with the time you have available, even if it is just a virtual hug when someone needs it.

eta: I wrote these without reading any other comments first.

[cindysilver.livejournal.com]

You're an amazing mother and wife. :) And a fascinating blogger!

[zencuppa.livejournal.com]

Hmm . . . You are persistent and tenacious in your desire and follow through when taking care of your family, yourself and your friends.

You truly think about things before acting, such as in your example to your daughters, cooking healthy meals, and your financial responsibility.

You get out of the way, when your family wants (and does) help you *grin.*

[seagrit.livejournal.com]

I am always amazed at the awe and love with which you describe your family. Even when you're frustrated about something, it's completely obvious just how much you love them.

[dd-b.livejournal.com]

You seem to have been doing very well with keeping up with physical activity, including biking to work, walks, and karate. Karate counts extra since it's quite challenging in and of itself, and you're taking on that challenge in addition to the time and energy.

Your daughters seem to be first-rate human beings, and a chunk of that has to be to your credit.

You've been coping with SAD and depression without losing your job, your family, or even all of your sense of humor.

You've been coping with the extra stress of Rob's job situation and now the overall economic meltdown without, so far as I know, killing anybody.

[weaselmom.livejournal.com]

You continue to have a positive influence in other people's lives, even if you don't know it. Your interest in soul collage inspired me - somebody who can only aspire to someday reach the artistic heights of kindergarten macaroni art - to take a chance on exploring arts and crafts. You don't have to hand me a fish, you don't have to teach me to fish - it's enough that *you* fish.

And you never, ever give up.

[merimask.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm rather new to your list of friends so I don't have much history with you, but still...

You are a kind and gentle soul. I admire your energy. You seem very dedicated to your family. You are taking care of yourself physically, by practicing karate which is an exacting discipline. You persevere in the face of opposition.

[airemay.livejournal.com]

You are raising wonderful daughters.

You continue to share your gift for beautiful words through this blog.

You make people smile every day. Generous statement, but I smiled the other day when I found my copy of Wild Swans that you autographed at Nimbus. :D Memories of your work bring me joy.

You spread tasty recipes and encourage people to think outside the box (like kale! I love kale now!!).

[http://users.livejournal.com/anam_cara_/]

You are insightful and introspective.

You care enough to bother... you make deliberate decisions, you deliberately do things (exercise, walking on the bridge, bicycling to work). I don't think you realize how many people trudge through life without doing anything deliberately. Even when you may feel utterly not in control of your destiny, in the chaos life throws at you, I admire how you try, try, try, and are so deliberate at facing life's ups and downs (even when facing something means backing down, retreating, or letting it go).

You are so involved. I can't believe all the friendships you maintain, the groups you interact with (church, SF/reading, karate, etc), your involvement with your daughter's activities, etc, etc, etc. I get overwhelmed just reading all you do, I don't know if you feel overwhelmed too, but regardless- you are connected, to others, your world.

You are loving, you may get frustrated, but you are not cynical nor bitter.

You are resilient. You may doubt it at times, but bottomline is, you are incredibly resilient.

[loup_noir]

You keep trying. No matter what life throws at you, you get back up and try. That's no small accomplishment.

[cakmpls.livejournal.com]

Your daughters. I know well how hard it is (as you and I have faced some of the same issues!), and they are doing beautifully. Their lives aren't perfect, aren't as good as we parents hope for (an impossible standard), but they're doing wonderfully well, even in trying circumstances.

Your marriage. At the least, you haven't hit Rob over the head with whatever is handy, and that's something! Nor, for that matter, has he hit you over the head. You've been married enough years that the urge to hit the other over the head has certainly been there!

Your friends, both in person and on LJ. Just look at the nice things they say about you: obviously you are doing something right.

Your openness and honesty here about your problems. It's probably good for you, but it's definitely good for others to know they aren't alone in difficulty.

Other stuff, but these are the biggies.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

Lots of people have said many of the things I was going to say. But I think that asking for help when you need it is definitely doing a thing right. It's something I've been struggling with myself.

[tenantofwildfel.livejournal.com]

I'm a lurker, so I can only comment on what I've read here.

1. You are an excellent parent who cares deeply for her children. Every entry you write about them is a constant expression of your love.

2. You are constantly seeking outlets for creative expression, whether it's your lunches, your soul collaging, or the paper you wrote for Fantasy Matters. (On a side note, you were also very nice to the incredibly geeky & nervous fan (aka, me) that complimented your writing after your heart of stone panel at the conference. I was so nervous, in fact, that I didn't get up the courage to ask you sign my book--which was in my bag. That, I think, probably indicates the level patience of needed with a fan like me . . .)

[ravenspb.livejournal.com]

Your sense of adventure inspires me. Yes, I said adventure. You cook wonderful things that others would not even consider, even in the face of withering criticism and keep on doing it. You've crashed and burned on the bike and keep riding it to work. You do what it takes to get things done.

Sure, you say you do so much of what you do out of necessity, trying to make good things happen in bad times. In my line of business, I hear from so many people who are just giving up. They want someone else to fix things for them. I'm sure you do as well, but you do things in the meantime. You fight.

You understand that, good or bad, life is an adventure and you keep on living it beyond what most people could do.

Like I said, in so many ways, you inspire me to go on in the face of my own adversities and they have been bad until recently. You do that just by living your life and sharing it with us. I hope you believe that and it lifts you up just a bit during days like this.

[lavendersleeves.livejournal.com]

You know, when most people feel down, the first thing they do is start to neglect small but important details regarding their health: stop taking vitamins, or stop taking showers, stop exercising.

I think the biggest thing you're doing right now is setting an example to your daughters:
...that a woman can be an athlete, even when she's no longer young (and that will extend the length of your life and theirs as well),

...that a woman can keep a job and support her family, even in difficult economic times,

...that a woman can be intelligent to write meaningful books in her spare time,

...that she can do all this and still be human enough to have maintain loving relationship with people in her life (a very feat!)

That's the kind of role model we could all use, frankly.

[haddayr.livejournal.com]

You are being nakedly honest, which takes courage.

You are a proud and supportive mamma.

You write intelligently and thoughtfully about spirit. I especially liked your posts on your retreat and the collages/cards you made.

[teacherla.livejournal.com]

Peg, your icon says to me all the things that you are doing right: you are keeping a candle lit against the darkness, for your family, for those of us who care about hearts of flesh and a full life of mind and heart and body. As long as you can write of your love and anxiety, as long as you can keep pushing against the pain and doubt, you're doing well -- better than a lot of us!

[febobe.livejournal.com]

You are a terrific mother, even though you may not always see it. Absolutely terrific. Your girls are living proof - such strong, beautiful young women they're growing into, and see a lot of you in them.

I admire your dedication to physical fitness, whether karate, biking, walking, or anything. . .you always seem to be doing something to stay in shape, and that's not something everyone keeps up with these days. Especially with the kind of odds you face (a hectic schedule, pressures, etc.).

You always write interesting LJ entries. I know that sounds like such a small thing, and it's probably for your own interest more than anything else, but I so enjoy your entries. . .they really are special, and often they make me smile, like the story of Delia and Rob cooking. :)

Peg, you hold it together against incredible odds. That alone is doing something right. Don't ever forget that.

[archmage45.livejournal.com]

I don't comment very often, so i guess that makes me a lurker, but I'd like to count you as a friend.

As for what you are doing right... you are inspirational. You have kept your humor and generally upbeat attitude in the face of trying times and trying people. You are raising two wonderful daughters with love, strength, humor, faith, and in doing so setting a great example for them.

[silme.livejournal.com]

You simply are an amazing lady, no question about it.

[musicbearmn.livejournal.com]

As you wish:

1. You are raising 2 wonderful young ladies into womanhood. What I would have given for parents like you during my teaching days...they were few and far between.
2. You have and continue to support your husband through his many ups and downs in employment. Many spouses would throw in the towel at that.
3. You continue to stretch yourself, whether it be through writing here on LJ, karate, or other pursuits.
4. For me, personally, your LJ brings me balance and has introduced me to an entirely different group of people, included minnehaha.
5. You help me see Harry Potter stuff from a whole different set of eyes.
6. Your spirit here is a beautiful one.

My life is enriched because of you in many ways.

[tassie-gal.livejournal.com]

You respect your daughters - and at the ages they are thats not something many parents do. But its BECAUSE of that you will have long lasting loving relationships with them.
You are an amazing person who admits they are not perfect but embraces the imprefection as what makes you uniquely you. This makes you a better person for recognising that you have faults.
You are stubborn about things you are passionate about, whick shows you have persistance and stickability. I dont know many people your age who would willingly go to karate and keep up with younger members.

[teamdoom.livejournal.com]

Another lurker...and I have to admit that your LJ is one of the few I check anymore. Your entries, whether about good times or bad, are always interesting, thought provoking, and well-written.

You deserve to hear this again and again: you are doing a fantastic job in so many areas of your life, and against circumstances that would have many (most?) of us curled up in a corner. You're raising strong, self-reliant and caring daughters--the strength of your relationships with each other shines through every post about them. You're supporting your family in so many ways. Your commitment to your continued growth, physically and mentally, is something I deeply admire.

You rock, Peg.

[prunesnprisms.livejournal.com]

I am not reading anything anyone else is saying, because I want to share my voice, and not a hundred dittoes.

I think you are raising beautiful daughters. Strong women.
You are exposing your family to healthy food.
You are teaching your girls that some goals take years to accomplish. This is something no one ever taught me. It will teach them patience and how to deal with small failures.
You are patient, especially with your husband, even though unemployment. I had to deal with this too and I suspect I did it with less grace.
You are exposing your girls to spirituality.
I bet you are doing a good job at your job, even if I don't know. You seem very dedicated and diligent.

You are trying to keep yourself together, and some days that's all there is to do.

[peacockharpy.livejournal.com]

I've been reading your journal for a loooooong time now and I am always eager to read what you've posted -- you always bring a perspective I cherish and admire. Yes, even when you're blazing away about food issues or the job search. ;)

You are taking care of your body in ways I wish I did: you bike to work, you are moving heaven and earth to continue with martial arts.

You are raising two wonderful, strong young women. They are wonderful and strong because they have you as an example.

Your recipe ideas are magnificent; I love reading when you make creative food things because it gives me good ideas, too.

You are so disciplined about finances and I really admire that. I know, necessity is a mother, and it probably doesn't feel like a "something you're doing right" but it is, really, it is. And you have not been afraid to let us know that sometimes it's heartbreaking; and sometimes you feel like it can be fun, like a challenge; and sometimes you just need that darn specialty coffee and it's okay to splurge. ;)

I haven't read anyone else's comments yet and I've been composing this all afternoon (around kids and dinner and a grocery run and all that) but I felt I really had to answer.