pegkerr: (But this is terrible!)
pegkerr ([personal profile] pegkerr) wrote2006-10-30 07:52 pm
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I'm afraid this is really not going to work

I am really an idiot for not realizing the total ramifications of this until now, but I think I am running into a problem of trying to make karate work.

The problem is the schedule. The dojo schedule I had posted on my kitchen bulletin board is an old one. That wasn't really a issue because the girls' classes were the same on both the old and the new schedule. But my class times are different than I realized they would be.

What it boils down to is that the girls' classes, three days a week, end forty minutes before my class begins. I discovered tonight that it is impossible to get the girls home after their class, serve them dinner and get back in time for my own class.

Monday: the girls 5:40 - 6:20. Me (sparring) 7:00 p.m. (I thought this class was at 7:40.)

It takes a few minutes to get out of the dojo: the girls have to gather their coats and put on their shoes. The drive to the dojo (or back) takes about twelve minutes. I made a crock pot meal tonight, but by the time I got home, dealt with a spill in the refrigerator, and got dinner on the table, class had already started. And not only would I have to drive back, I would have had to get on my sparring gear, which would make me even later to get started.

Wednesday is even worse. The girls' class starts at 5:00 and goes till 5:40. My class is at 6:20. I would have to drop Delia at home (12 minutes), change into my gi (if I didn't have it on already), drive Fiona to the church for confirmation (12 minutes), rush back to the dojo for my class (20 minutes), rush back to pick up Fiona and drive home. Again, not enough time.

Friday would have the same schedule as Monday, except that's the girls' sparring day. So there would be a delay after class for them to get all their sparring gear off and packed away. Again, there wouldn't be time enough to get them home, get dinner served and eaten and get back in time to make class.

There isn't any public transportation that could solve this issue, and Rob is not able to help with any of this carpooling. He doesn't get off work on time, and he is not reliable. I can't take my classes with the girls--they don't mix kids and adults at my dojo, and besides, we are at different belt levels. And I don't want to make them wait for an hour and a half after their own class ends for them to get home and eat dinner. With their homework they don't have time to waste, and they wouldn't be able to wait until 8:00 p.m. to eat dinner when they have to be in bed by 8:30 in order to get up to get out to the bus stop in the morning by 7:00 a.m.

Bottom line? Either I forget about dinner, for either me or the girls, or give up the idea of taking karate. I really don't want to give up the dinner hour--that is just about the only family time we have left.

I guess this means I am not going to be taking karate after all.

shit.

Well, there's one good thing: I won't have to clean the dojo now.

Edited to add: I don't think I'm looking for advice right now. Just commiseration, I guess.

Edited to add again: I am really REALLY miserable over this. I mean, I'm in tears over it. I wanted it so badly.

It'll be a year before the girls change classes. They're going to be in this class until they pass their black belts.

[identity profile] pegkerr.livejournal.com 2006-10-31 02:55 am (UTC)(link)
I know you don't feel comfortable having them hang out until your class is over, but think about this for a few moments with a slightly greedy heart. Would that be so bad?

We did do this during some of the time we were both taking classes last year. The girls absolutely hated it.

Yes, I want karate classes. But I also want the dinner hour. You see, that is not simply the time that we re-fuel our bodies. That time is the anchor bedrock of our family; our only real time together. It is the time where we go around and each say our day went, it is THAT time that connects us, that actually makes us a family. On Mondays and Fridays I wouldn't get home until almost 8:00. That is too late for starting dinner, too late for an expedition elsewhere.

No, switching family time to breakfast would not work. I am the only person who is actually awake in the morning.

This just SUCKS.

loup_noir: (Default)

[personal profile] loup_noir 2006-10-31 03:03 am (UTC)(link)
Ah. When you put it that way, I understand.

Darn it. There has to be a good compromise here somewhere.

*thinks* Has some wine. *thinks*

Crockpot cooking? Big veggie soups? Mac and cheese?

This inspires divisive thinking. Part of me wants you to forge ahead, damn the whole family dinner thing, but I see so many kids who are unable to function in what my aged brain thinks of as family and socialized. No, this is something that needs to be thought through.

Doggone it.