"She is passing into the shadow world. She'll soon become a wraith, like them."

[pegkerr]

Have been thinking the last couple of days that this obsessional stage that I'm in is waxing rather strong, to the point that I am becoming, well, rather unbalanced.

The family and I went to see Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets on Friday night. It was Rob's birthday, and he quite gracefully resigned himself to the inevitable; he has known for months how it would be celebrated. I enjoyed the movie, for the most part (that is, of course, until the very last scene, which just about killed it; that's the director's fault I suppose. It felt as if there was any attempt to hit any honest emotional notes in that scene, everyone missed by several thousand miles). I have mixed feelings about Rupert Grint's mugging: close, but perhaps a tad over the top. Will withhold judgment for the time being. Will be curious to see how the next director handles him. I am perfectly willing to acquiesce with epicyclical's decision to award Dan Radcliffe the "My, How You've Grown" award. alexmalfoy and epicyclical, you two can slug it out on who should enjoy the favors and undivided attention of Mr. Coulson; I feel no urge to get involved on that particular issue. I don't find him particularly attractive (Besides, let's be honest: he's more than a couple decades younger than me, which probably means he wouldn't be very interested in me anyway. It Wasn't Meant to Be).

If you want further reviews of the movie, there are plenty of people who will give you their exhaustive opinion. I'm a little surprised at myself that I haven't been thinking about it very much. Well yes, I saw it twice, and I liked it, but I am not sure that I will see it again for a while. I'm not as caught up in that movie as I was in the first one that came out last year. I think I will be more interested when the fifth book comes out.

Instead, I've fallen into another obsession spiral over The Lord of the Rings, and this one looks as though it is going to go very deep.

I blame the extended version DVD, and the fact that I bought a number of the books that have come out about The Two Towers. I am in a fever state of anticipation about the movie release next month. I still can't watch the movie DVD all the way through (from the Mirror of Galadriel on it just keeps freezing every three seconds or so). But I watched the new scenes in the first half, and I watched the appendices disks this weekend. I realize that I've spent a dreadful amount of time the past two weeks thinking about both the book and the movies.

Part of the problem is that work is extremely slow right now for me. As in, just dead. Nothing at all to do . . .unless I beg the other secretaries for work, and then they give me mind-numbing scut work that they don't want to do themselves. I just don't have enough to fill my thoughts during the day. I noticed that I have been skipping between reading about three different books this week, a bad sign--that means that I am having difficulty paying attention to one. I had started planning a new book to write, but unlike all of you who are merrily churning out words for nanowrimo (yes, you sallygardens, redbird and peacockharpy, I'm talking about you!) I am still missing an elusive element in the plot, something that would put me past the tipping point and allow me to start writing. I went to World Fantasy, and a panel there got me thinking about LOTR again.

Then the LOTR:FOTR extended DVD came out, and . . . I realized that I didn't exercise at all this past week. I was staying up too late at night, watching the DVD, or reading the book I got about the Two Towers movie, or thinking and so wasn't able to drag myself out of bed at 5:15 a.m. to do step or weightlifting. I also suddenly realized that I've had a couple hypoglycemic spells in the last week, too--that's because I haven't been the least bit interested in cooking or eating. I am isolating myself in my office, and snapping at my family because I don't want to be interrupted. And I'm shorting myself on sleep.

Not good, Peg. I probably need to start doing the light box again . . . it's dark enough that perhaps the seasonal affective disorder is starting to affect me, which isn't helping.

Sermon this morning was on the gospel parable of the talents. I have always interpreted that story as a warning to me that I should be writing, rather than frittering my time away.

Well, I know what the problem is (too much fannish obsessing, pulling my life out of balance). Not sure I have the will power to do what I must, which is to put away all the stuff I am obsessing about. But I really must wrench my attention back to the new book.

Peg

Comments

[lemonlye.livejournal.com]

If it's any consolation, I have plenty to do (grade homework, write a thesis, go to class, etc), and I'm obsessing over LOTR anyway. I get restless trying to fall asleep, because my thoughts always go to the movies and the actors. I'd love to talk to the latter the way they talk to each other (in all that entertaining commentary), and as to the movies, I lose even more sleep actually worrying about how certain scenes will look.

Will they have Frodo asleep in Sam's arms as the end of the next film, after their conversation about being in storybooks someday? Is that what the title "Samwise the Brave" means, on the new soundtrack listing? I need to know this or I cannot relax. How will the Shelob/Choices of Master Samwise scene look, in the third film? What about the farewells at the Grey Havens? I must visualize every detail; I must pin down the music and the lighting and the lines and everything. Why won't anyone tell me this? Can't they see it's important?

So sad.
Yes...working on our own stories would probably help a great deal. But it's just so easy, in this instance, to do nothing but be a fan. This is an uncommon feeling for me. Kind of enjoying it, secretly, though. :)

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

This is an uncommon feeling for me. Kind of enjoying it, secretly, though. :)

Well, it's not an uncommon feeling for me; I've dealt with fannish obsessions periodically through my life, since the age of eight, approximately (to the best of my recollection, Narnia was the first). And yes, I enjoy it, too, hugely, but I have come to the conclusion in the last few years that when it gets very intense, it's not very good for me. I do think it is right at the root of why I became a writer; I get obsessed with story. But it can get so bad that it interferes with creating my own work and living a healthy life. I'm at a loss as to how to switch it off. I'm not sure I can. I suppose it's like the tendency to be manic depressive, which is linked with creativity, too. Very wearing, but oh, those highs can be wonderful for the creative mind.

My family of origin was always baffled by this tendency in me. It baffles me, too. But this tendency in me to fannishly obsess is definitely one of the very strongest forces in my life.

Peg

[corinnethewise.livejournal.com]

I have a question, if you don't mind answering. What denomination are you? You said that the sermon was on use of talents, and that's what ours was too (I'm ELCA Lutheran), was just wondering.
-Corinne

ELCA Lutheran

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

I was raised Presbyterian, but I got sucked into ELCA Lutheranism when I went to St. Olaf College. It was the music that pulled me in, I think: Presbys aren't nearly as musically oriented as Lutherans. I frequently serve as the Assistant Minister (singing the Kyrie) at my church.

I'm most irritated with the ELCA Lutheran church over their (less than progressive) stand disallowing gays in relationships to serve as ministers. I concentrate on trying to change the church from the inside (I thought it was a hopeful sign that my church devoted one of the adult Sunday School forums to discussing The Wild Swans).

Peg

[peacockharpy.livejournal.com]

If it's any consolation... the novel I'm writing for NaNoWriMo is based on an idea I started with two years ago and gave up on, because I was just missing some specific element to make it work. I kept trying to write it but, as you are experiencing with Solveig's story, it wasn't quite ready to be written, somehow. The missing something kicked into place this year (at WFC, conveniently enough) so I made it my NaNovel. (And with work as it currently is - dull as ditchwater and nothing going on - at least I have the novel to focus on.)

As for LoTR:TTT -- hey, it's the holiday season, right? So give yourself a little fun. (I'll be at the movies on opening night...) :)

[serendipoz.livejournal.com]

I think it's possible that your time mulling deeply on LoTR may just jell the novel being born. Time out is needed, too.

[trinker.livejournal.com]

I've managed to avoid getting sucked into LOTR obsessive fannishness this time, but I was pretty darned hardcore hooked earlier this year. (Evidence of just how much resides at googlegroups, in the rasseff archives.)

I'm quite amazed, really. Meanwhile, I've been whacking away at the necessary research for my own project(s). This bout of obsession might just be something you have to hit bottom on...