Peg Kerr's Journal

It sort of seems to me that, with these big issues of identity and self-perception and desire, and with any number of other things (like how to handle a delicate parenting situation), it's a lot less important to have an answer than it is to be able to perceive and *sit with* the questions.

The questions in life have a lot more staying power than answers ever do, anyhow. That's been my experience so far, at least.

These have been some fabulous explorations of some really good questions. It's like a treasure-hunt, when exploring the ramifications of one question open up a half-dozen new questions you hadn't known existed. And it's the questions which are the treasure.

I resonate a lot to what you're describing and agree with a lot of it - and also have some markedly different experiences and differences of opinion about some aspects of training and martial arts. But mainly, I'm enjoying reading /your/ thoughts about them.

But...to sing, to laugh, to dream,
To walk in my own way and be alone,
Free, with an eye to see things as they are...
...at a word, a Yes, a No,
To fight--or write. To travel any road that lies
Under the sun, under the stars, nor doubt
If fame or fortune lie beyond the bourne--
Never to make a line I have not heard
In my own heart; yet, with all modesty
To say, "My soul, be satisfied with flowers,
With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them
In the one garden you may truly call your own."

(Cyrano de Bergerac, Edmond Rostand, trans. Brian Hooker.)


I will say that, from my position on the sidelines, it makes me happy to see you taking possession of your own training, your own internal battles, your triumphs, your power, your hopes for the future - that it's very much about Fiona and Delia, but it's not *only* about Fiona and Delia. I'm glad of that.