That's what this is all about, I think. If karate is giving you personal fulfillment, it's tough to argue against it. What I say about it really won't help you or anyone else, because it's such a personal dilemma. But I thought I'd chime in with a few ideas.
The strongest argument is, of course, the money--if spending so much will cause financial hardship or will take up the "wiggle room" that your family has, then you probably should postpone this until the daughters are older and have made decisions about college. (I always knew that I'd have to get a scholarship because my dad's health failed and my parents made no provisions for me--but it was no obstacle, for I was and am very unathletic and inclined to sit around and read/write/think or argue scholarly stuff, so. Also knew to take that PSAT so I could get my National Merit scholarship; if you don't take the PSAT, you aren't considered by NMSC. BUT if children kind of "expect" that you have made plans, then you make sacrifices, as you already know, o'course). I quit taking piano again because it cost too much and took too much of my time, and thus was unfair to other members of our household who weren't spending $75 an hour every week and then practicing while the vacuum went untouched. But I also quit because I would never be able to play the classical repertoire the way I play pop and jazz, and it seemed futile to work daily on interpretation and so forth to please a particular teacher when I wouldn't be playing for anyone but myself. So piano returned to being a creative outlet for me. (I've always played by ear and already play intermediate repertoire, but I was trying to move to advanced.) Thre may be a similar sacrifice involved in your going to pursue black belt rather than staying at the level you have now. (The teacher's concern is, of course, in part the MONEY. So they ALWAYS want to take you further. :)
The secondary consideration, to me, is that martial arts DO teach you ways to stay safe on the streets. But how many times are you outside of the suburban safety net, anyhow, and walking at night, etc.? There's always a possibility that you'll encounter some problem, but do you have to be a black belt to handle most situations? My friend was doing Tae Kwan Do because her hubby wanted to, but she developed painful forearms, and the doctor said that she should try stopping the sparring and see if they didn't stop (he had her in full arm braces for carpal tunnel, etc., when he mentioned this.) Two weeks out of the dojo and her arms recovered. So there are injuries that you can get doing serious work. She used to have bruises on her ribs just about every Tuesday.
However, if these two aren't the issues, it's mostly a crapshoot. I know from what Terry told me of TKD that the endorphin rush can be addictive--she hated to drop out of class (and that was one of the few times she got to do something with her hubby, as his hobbies were so different from hers and he was inclined to spend lots of time away), but she couldn't type and do her job if she kept it up. It took a few weeks for the desire to do the poses (you can see I know nothing about this past having seen "The Karate Kid" once) to go away. She went to yoga and kept up her physical condition, and said aerobics was as good for her figure as martial arts, so I suppose she "recovered" from the addiction. She said if she hadn't had the injury, she probably would've signed the contract to keep going, and then that would have been so expensive that she couldn't pay off her credit cards. (Her daughters were grown by the time she did this--already on their own.)
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Your personal fulfillment vs your perceived responsibilities
Date: 2005-07-16 08:01 pm (UTC)The strongest argument is, of course, the money--if spending so much will cause financial hardship or will take up the "wiggle room" that your family has, then you probably should postpone this until the daughters are older and have made decisions about college. (I always knew that I'd have to get a scholarship because my dad's health failed and my parents made no provisions for me--but it was no obstacle, for I was and am very unathletic and inclined to sit around and read/write/think or argue scholarly stuff, so. Also knew to take that PSAT so I could get my National Merit scholarship; if you don't take the PSAT, you aren't considered by NMSC. BUT if children kind of "expect" that you have made plans, then you make sacrifices, as you already know, o'course). I quit taking piano again because it cost too much and took too much of my time, and thus was unfair to other members of our household who weren't spending $75 an hour every week and then practicing while the vacuum went untouched. But I also quit because I would never be able to play the classical repertoire the way I play pop and jazz, and it seemed futile to work daily on interpretation and so forth to please a particular teacher when I wouldn't be playing for anyone but myself. So piano returned to being a creative outlet for me. (I've always played by ear and already play intermediate repertoire, but I was trying to move to advanced.) Thre may be a similar sacrifice involved in your going to pursue black belt rather than staying at the level you have now. (The teacher's concern is, of course, in part the MONEY. So they ALWAYS want to take you further. :)
The secondary consideration, to me, is that martial arts DO teach you ways to stay safe on the streets. But how many times are you outside of the suburban safety net, anyhow, and walking at night, etc.? There's always a possibility that you'll encounter some problem, but do you have to be a black belt to handle most situations? My friend was doing Tae Kwan Do because her hubby wanted to, but she developed painful forearms, and the doctor said that she should try stopping the sparring and see if they didn't stop (he had her in full arm braces for carpal tunnel, etc., when he mentioned this.) Two weeks out of the dojo and her arms recovered. So there are injuries that you can get doing serious work. She used to have bruises on her ribs just about every Tuesday.
However, if these two aren't the issues, it's mostly a crapshoot. I know from what Terry told me of TKD that the endorphin rush can be addictive--she hated to drop out of class (and that was one of the few times she got to do something with her hubby, as his hobbies were so different from hers and he was inclined to spend lots of time away), but she couldn't type and do her job if she kept it up. It took a few weeks for the desire to do the poses (you can see I know nothing about this past having seen "The Karate Kid" once) to go away. She went to yoga and kept up her physical condition, and said aerobics was as good for her figure as martial arts, so I suppose she "recovered" from the addiction. She said if she hadn't had the injury, she probably would've signed the contract to keep going, and then that would have been so expensive that she couldn't pay off her credit cards. (Her daughters were grown by the time she did this--already on their own.)
(continued on next rock)