Struggling to decide about Minicon

[pegkerr]

I am giving serious consideration to not going to Minicon this year.

I always bitch about money this time of year--the February - April period is always a perfect storm in my household of short paychecks and higher expenses. Not expenses left over from the holiday, mind you--we always fund that as we go each year. But Rob's attorney dues come due this time of year each year (and whoa, boy, just try to pay that stiff fee out of unemployment). Yet I have always gone to Minicon and eventually gotten over my grouch and had a good time.

This year, for the first time, I really feel compelled to skip. How can I justify paying the registration fee, when we are struggling so hard? And the cost of eating out? I don't plan to participate in programming anyway. They made it clear I'd be welcome to do so, but this spring's depression made me not followup on their overtures, and I'm not writing fiction for publication anymore, and I just didn't want to sit up there on panels and feel all that awful I'm-not-writing-anymore crap. There are some things I plan to do with my money this spring that I genuinely place at a higher priority.

The thing is, Rob and the girls are determined to go. The girls are so desperate to go that they've offered to pay for one night in the hotel with their own money.

So it's clear that if I bite the bullet and do what I think is the responsible, fiscally prudent thing, I'll be doing it by myself. The rest of the family will go off to have fun at Minicon and I'll be sitting at home alone.

I'm not asking anyone to solve this for me. I mean it.

I'm just saying that this sucks.

What I did today to make the world a better place: participated in a meeting at my law firm to brainstorm the firm's direction in pursuing pro bono opportunities.

Comments

[auriaephiala.livejournal.com]

Could you reduce your cost of admission by volunteering in some way?

[dd-b.livejournal.com]

No.

[laurel]

Expanding on dd_b's "No" in case anyone is curious:

Minicon doesn't give discounted rates to volunteers or program participants. Everyone pays the same price for memberships, even those who work on the con year round. Guests of honor get in for free as do former GoHs, but that's pretty much it except for the occasional special case. (I know some outside speakers and musicians have been comped at some Minicons.)

[dd-b.livejournal.com]

(Not for Peg, who probably knows this, but for others reading her LJ who may now.)

In fact, if I volunteered to run something significant next year to the point where I was "on the concom", that would trump my former-guest status, and I would have to pay the usual membership fee for the privilege of working hard. The egalitarianism trumps even the hospitality to former guests.

[serenejournal.livejournal.com]

Does sound like it sucks. (In your shoes, I think I'd sit down with Rob and discuss the gap between what you think y'all can afford and what he thinks you can, but that's not advice, just 'thinking aloud', as it were.)

[dd-b.livejournal.com]

That's a lot of conflict. I hope you figure out *something* to do that you can live with.

[minnehaha.livejournal.com]

I believe I have access to two memberships at the pre-reg rate, and will be looking for people to buy them. I'll know more later today as just got wind of it a few hours ago.

K.

[mrissa.livejournal.com]

That's frustrating. I'm sorry.

It sounds awfully nice, though, that your daughters share interests with you and their father that strongly. I have that kind of relationship with my parents, though not on the convention end of my life, and it's really nice to have things that we genuinely enjoy in common.

[naomikritzer]

That sucks, Peg.

I will put my vote in for going; I think for your family, skipping Minicon would be worse than canceling Christmas. You can economize (buy someone's pre-reg memberships, let the girls pay a night at the hotel -- I actually think this is a fine idea -- and eat your meals in the con suite or on a hot pot in your hotel room or at Subway) but don't skip. Go and see your friends and relax.

(I'm not going, because when I looked at my calendar for the week and thought about adding a con to the mix, I felt vaguely ill from the impending stress. We just got back from five days in Massachusetts helping my father-in-law move, and we're going to a Seder tonight and another one tomorrow night and then on Sunday my daughters are singing at the Easter Mass -- fun with intermarriage! twice the holidays! -- and OMG I like cons and all but right now I just want to enjoy being in my own house.)

[eal.livejournal.com]

Wow, that is frustrating.

I'm sorry and I hope that a clear way appears to you soon.

[laurel]

That does suck.

I wrote in my LJ how Minicon is one of those "can't miss" things for me so I relate to what Rob and the girls are feeling. But I also know what it's like to feel like you can't justify an expense and know how that can sap enjoyment out of things. For me, Minicon is enough of a social and thought-provoking event that it invigorates me so going, even when depressed and/or broke tends to help me.

The years when I've been cash strapped, I've still gone to Minicon but I've economized by sharing a room or cutting down on the nights I stay there. By getting memberships at the pre-reg rate. By taking food to the con in a cooler, watching out for real food in the consuite, and planning meals out carefully.

Rob & the girls might want to keep an eye out for the free pizza and other more substantial food they offer in the consuite from time to time (usually around logical mealtimes, but it varies. A person could talk to those running the consuite to get the skinny or volunteer there to learn more too I imagine). I also know that kaustin is gonna have cornbread and brownies and muffins in the gaming area because he's been baking up a storm here.

They do have student rates for Minicon memberships these days, which is a cool thing.

[aome.livejournal.com]

Big hugs for a really yucky rock-and-hard-place situation.

[pameladean]

Oh, that's a really hard one.

It wouldn't really seem like Minicon without you there, but I understand your conflict.

P.

[dichroic.livejournal.com]

That's not right, if you end up being the only one who economizes. (Not so much for the girls, if they're using their own money.)

What about sitting down as a family and saying, "we do not have the money for Minicon. If you are that set on going, we will need to either make more money or spend less somewhere else. Let's brainstorm about where."

[murumatsu.livejournal.com]

Hard decision.

If you decide NOT to go, is there any way you could see this as enjoyable solitude rather than sitting at home alone? Time when you don't have to take care of anybody, the house isn't being messed up, time to have a chance to do something just for yourself? (I love my family but it would be awfully nice to occasionally not deal with them!)

[jbru.livejournal.com]

I'm kind of in the same position. I feel a bit obligated to go because there will be things going on there for my and Ericka's benefit. At the same time, I can't really afford a membership, particularly at the at-the-door rate. Even if I spring for a membership, or can find one at a reduced rate, I'll really only be able to be at the con for a little while on Saturday as we'll need someone to stay home with Ericka in any case.

Sigh. To be young and have Good Friday as a paid holiday again!