Choices

[pegkerr]

Elinor Dashwood is not doing very well tonight.

I am struggling quite painfully with an exceedingly difficult decision. The problem is, if I do what I increasingly want to do, what I feel I must do if I am not going to go mad, I know that there are going to be many, many people who are going to be quite angry and disappointed with me. Including, I am afraid, some of you. I will be letting them--letting you--down.

I hate letting people down.

This is probably all that Elinor Dashwood can say on the subject for the time being.

I feel that I'm not doing an adequate job at just about anything in my life right now.

Comments

[vass]

*offers Elinor Dashwood a cup of tea*

Please, do what you must do and don't worry about letting other people down by it.

I feel that I'm not doing an adequate job at just about anything in my life right now.

I think you're doing a fine job. As it happens, I think quite a few of those reading your post could make a tentative guess at what your hard decision is about, and I'm sure we wish you well whatever you decide. Only you can know what choice is the right one, and it need not - often will not - be what looks best from the outside. I can't say anything more except ask you to please, please, don't give up on yourself as a *person*. You have lots of strengths, in lots of areas, and you spend so much time nurturing them all in their turn. One of them is the ability to be happy.