Today's parenting challenge

[pegkerr]

One of the toughest and most important things I have to teach my kids is that life isn't fair.

Fiona got an invitation from a friend to go to the State Fair on Friday. Delia was in tears because Fiona was invited but she was not. Then Fiona was in tears because Delia was upset, and because this friend is fighting with another friend, and so they aren't really doing stuff as a trio any more.

I agreed with Delia that yes, it wasn't fair. She said that she wanted to go to the State Fair, that we never got to go. Well, we really haven't since she was a baby. The thing is, both girls want to go to the Renaissance Festival this year, and we can't afford to do both.

So I told her that we would definitely go to the Renaissance Festival this year, and we would try to do the State Fair next year. I told her that I would ordinarily give her some time to get over this herself, but I had to go to work and so wanted to help her sort it out (yes, I had to go back into work at 9:00 p.m. tonight. Ick.) I advised her to take fifteen to twenty minutes to be really hurt and upset and disappointed, but then to do her best to set that disappointment aside.

Then I went downstairs and dried Fiona's tears. I solemnly agreed that it was unfair that Delia was so upset that she, Fiona, got to go to the State Fair when Delia had gone to so many more birthday parties this year. I told her that getting over her disappointment was Delia's problem. I told her that it sucked when her friends were fighting. I agreed that life is sometimes unfair.

*sigh* And then I went to work and typed legal briefs until 11:30 p.m. Yes, sometimes I really am a superwoman.

Comments

[resqdog51.livejournal.com]

Yes, sometimes I really am a superwoman.



....oh boy and how. *impressed*

[jbru.livejournal.com]

Yack! 9:00 p.m.! For a mother of two! That's unreasonable. That's "overtime isn't compensation enough" unreasonable. (You do get paid overtime, I hope.)

Well, at least you got to be an object lesson in the "life isn't fair" curriculum. You always seem so wise and helpful to your daughters; I'm amazed.

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

What really sucked was that it wasn't overtime, even though I worked ten hours today, because I took two vacation days this week. It'll be paid as straight time.

Which is why I told them I wouldn't stay until 3:00 a.m. They have two other secretaries who are doing that (!)

[jbru.livejournal.com]

Aargh! I rail at them on general principles! We must find you more suitable employment.

Speaking of sucking...

[amandageist.livejournal.com]

I work a salary, so I don't get overtime. My team is short-staffed, and I have not left here before 11:00 on any day in the last two weeks.

My kids have learned to dial my cellphone number.

Re: Speaking of sucking...

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

My sympathies.

[kiwiria.livejournal.com]

You deserve a medal!

...but then, I think any good parent deserves one now and again :-)

[sarekofvulcan.livejournal.com]

Cool. Can you send me one?

[kiwiria.livejournal.com]

No, but I can send you a gold star.

[sarekofvulcan.livejournal.com]

Go, Supermom! *hugs*

[aome.livejournal.com]

You really ARE superwoman. I like how you let each girl acknowledge their hurt for awhile before trying to get over it. I hope things were calmer today. Give yourself a pat on the back.

I'm wishing very much that we could get to the RenFaire this year but, alas, I think still too ambitious with little munchkins.

[redbird]

Yay you!

[mayakda.livejournal.com]

You are an AWESOME mom!!!!!

[glinda-w.livejournal.com]

well done.

much better to learn the "life isn't fair" lesson while young... (me, I'm still fighting the "but it should be fair" thing *sigh*)

[faithhopetricks.livejournal.com]

You ARE superwoman. And supermom. Man, I can't even handle it when one of my cats hacks up a hairball in the morning when I'm trying to get organized.

[kijjohnson.livejournal.com]

Life isn't fair if you have to go to work at 9.

Really.

[amandageist.livejournal.com]

Are you telling me that this sort of tempest in a teacup isn't standard daily fare? My kids can find four things to be upset-to-tears about the unfairness thereof, before breakfast on a given day. Handling it is just part of the standard job description.

Re: Really.

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

Are you telling me that this sort of tempest in a teacup isn't standard daily fare?

Uh, no. I'm not quite sure I'm quite perceiving the tone of your comment correctly, particularly combined with your icon.

Yeah, it's small. Yeah, it's mundane. I choose to write about small and mundane things sometimes. To you and me, experienced parents, this sort of conversation with my kids goes without saying, and yeah, it's not anything to really pat myself on the back about, I suppose.

But I'm aware that there are a number of people who read my journal who aren't parents, and some of them have told me that they like to read what I write about these small and mundane decisions that a parent have to make, because it gives them a much better idea of the day-to-day life of a parent. Heaven knows I found it extremely helpful to observe my sister as a parent years before I had my own children. So I was writing it partly for them, too.

Re: Really.

[amandageist.livejournal.com]

With respect to my tone, I think it was that I could detect no facetiousness at all in your "superwoman" line. I'm not trying to one-up you or anything, but that really does just sound like a standard day in the life of any working mom. It didn't even seem too terribly wearing on you, from what you wrote--just many details to see to.

I must stop reading this--I have my own marathon tonight. When I leave work (soon, I hope), I have to swing by Target and get birthday presents for some co-workers' children's parties this weekend. They both forgot to send me the invites and I of course forgot, and so it's very last-minute now. Hope they don't mind Christmas paper.
:D

~A (oh, and that's just my default icon)

[origamilady.livejournal.com]

Just saying, but you rock!! :)

[avengangle.livejournal.com]

I'm just impressed.

*cheers*