This is just . . . weird

[pegkerr]

Doctor in trouble for calling woman obese.

The story doesn't say exactly how he phrased what he said to her. I gotta think there is more to the story here.

It makes me think of that term Berke Breathed coined: "Offensensitivity."

Comments

[althea_valara]

Dr. Terry Bennett says he tells obese patients their weight is bad for their health and their love lives

Hmm. Personally, unless I am complaining about my lack of a love life to my doctor, I don't think any doctor has the right to say that excess weight will impact my love life. Because (a) that's my private business, and (b) plenty of overweight/obese people have healthy, fulfilling love lives. So I would be pretty ticked if he said something like that.

Even so, I'm not sure it's right of her to sue. America is too lawsuit happy these days, and I don't really like it. If it was me, I'd just find a new doc and badmouth him to all my friends, so they know not to go to him.

[cornfields.livejournal.com]

It's no longer PC to call someone out on their fatness? Jesus Christ. There are no words.

[megd.livejournal.com]

Sadly, I think there might not be. Dad's gotten threats from patients that he was out of line to suggest they floss. People are crazy these days, especially when you dare to suggest they are wrong.

You know I hate getting lectures from my doctor about my weight. But that's what he's for.

[callunav.livejournal.com]

Hmp.

I've been told I need to lose weight by doctors. I thank them and tell them what I'm doing toward those ends, and then I expect to move on. When doctors can't move on, I lose respect for them, and make things very, very blunt. I've found, "I have a history of eating disorders. I'm not willing to talk about this any more," works pretty well - but I don't like having to bring out the artillary. While my weight is one part of my health, it's certainly not the whole thing, or even the most important part.

(Moreover, I had doctors talking to me about losing weight for a decade before anyone bothered to find out that I have a completely nonfunctional thyroid. Let's look a little less at symptoms and a little more at causes, shall we? Weight is not a neutral, judgment-free subject even in the doctor's office, however much people may want to think it is. There is prejudice - prejudgment - against both those who are thought to be too fat and those who are thought to be too thin; somehow, in this country, it's got the quality of a moral issue.)

The article quotes him as saying that he tries to 'get their attention.' My understanding of this is that he feels that making broader or more personal statements may startle people into 'paying attention.' I can understand why he'd feel the urge, but it's not a good plan.

If any doctor told me I needed to lose weight for the sake of my love life, as he freely states he does, I'd raise one heck of a stink. That's unprofessional, insulting, and untrue.

[malinaldarose.livejournal.com]

Isn't "obese" a medical term?

[redbird]

Context matters. I have a friend whose doctor insisted on giving her a "you should lose weight" speech and ignored the reason she was in his office: a broken ankle.

It's remotely possible a thinner woman wouldn't have fallen, but the doctor didn't want to treat the broken bone because he was fixated on her weight.

[jbru.livejournal.com]

There probably is more to the story. Far too many doctors, as erickavan can attest, see a patient's weight more than they see the reason their patient is in their office. If this doctor remarked on the woman's weight when it did not relate to her presenting problem or, as the story seems to suggest, was indelicate about how he thought her weight might affect other parts of her life, that's out of line.

[pameladean]

I'd complain too. He's perpetuating a nasty stereotype about fat people in the line about her love life. If she didn't ask him about it, what the hell business has he got bringing it up? Also, you know, he is really wrong about the weight. It's not going to kill her. If she is sedentary and makes a lot of food choices that are bad for her, that could kill her.

P.



P.

[copperwise.livejournal.com]

Difficulty losing weight is a symptom of both hypothyroid and PCOS. For years before I was diagnosed with both, I dieted and exercised and struggled and got to the verge of suicide over my weight.

I had doctors who called me lazy and said I had no willpower. I had doctors who pooh-poohed every issue I went in to address, telling me it would just go away if I lost weight. I have a knee that has gone from bad to worse over the years because no doctor would even x-ray it -- "it's just stressed from weight, lose weight and it will get better." Funny, when a doctor finally addressed it, it turns out to be an issue with the cartilage which is going to be a problem fat or thin, and which has hurt me at my lowest and highest weights.

When I finally spent two years researching my own symptoms and took a 3 inch thick notebook of information to a new doctor, she *finally* ran the tests for PCOS. Guess what? Now I go to one of the top endocrinologists in the country, who tells me with my endocrine conditions he doubts I'll be able to lose very much weight, and I need to focus on being as healthy at this weight as I can.

I don't think anyone who hasn't been obese quite understands just how rude and dismissive doctors can be about it. I had a doctor scribble a "prescription" on his little pad and hand it to me as I left my appointment. It said "Put down fork. Push away from the table." I had a doctor ask me if I ever looked in the mirror. I've had exactly one doctor not familiar with my underlying symptoms tell me they were concerned about my weight and ask if I'd like to address it. That's the appropriate way to handle it. Not by degrading and abusing the patient.

And I don't seem to have any problems finding people who think I'm attractive, regardless of my own struggle with self-esteem. If this doctor actually thinks he has the right to tell his patients that their weight and their love lives are connected, I would safely bet the entire contents of my bank account that he is flat out rude and whatever he specifically said to this woman was traumatic for her. Good for her for reporting him rather than just going home feeling like utter crap and hating herself, like so many of us have done for years. Being a doctor isn't a license to be cruel.

[dreamcoat-mom.livejournal.com]

I saw the news story this morning. I also saw the way in which this man interacts with people. He is definitely NOT a people person, judging by his verbal diatribe, I'd guess (and that's only a guess) that his "apology" was probably pretty left-handed. Whether he had his patient's best interest at heart is irrelevant. He approached the problem in such a way that the Dr./Patient relationship was completely destroyed, precluding any chance of saving that patient's health - I would LOVE to hear the patient's side of it before rushing to judgment in favor of the nice, thin doctor.

I'm overweight - have been for most of my adult life. I've dieted strictly, exercised, had surgery, done EVERYTHING because doctors have told me I'll be dead by the age of 50 if I don't halt my self-destruct course. Despite all that, I still stubbornly remain a size 20. It's my grandmother's body - the exact same shape, her bosom, her hips, her tiny hands and feet. She lived to be 93, and was NOT an overeater. I don't have high blood pressure, my blood sugar is fine, my heart is strong, I move just fine - I'm just not thin.

I met with a nutritionist and kept a strict food diary. What I found was that I eat a healthy balance of foods at normal portions, occasionally going after sugar or starch unnecessarily, but not habitually enough to condemn me as a "self-destruct" case. She said I was doing great, just to watch sugar and starch intakes, and be mindful of how much fat is in a meal - but I do that anyhow for my family's sake.

What upsets me about the medical community and the issue of obesity is the insistence that ALL medical issues stem from the weight, and the insistence that despite the laws of heredity, everyone was born to be thin. They may be treating thin people for medical issues, but won't treat someone my size until I lose weight FIRST. Given my history, that's not likely to happen, so can I assume that I'll go untreated? I have some hormonal issues that are plaguing me in ways that are becoming debilitating, yet the last doctor I went to will not treat me until I lose weight. I did lose a couple of dress sizes (from a 22 to an 18) but can't go any further. The symptoms that were supposedly caused by my weight have actually increased and I'm afraid to go back. Until I screw up the courage again, I'll go untreated.

For those who have never fought their weight in any real sense (I'm not talking about 10-15 vanity pounds) the issue is often equated with a lack of moral character. Yet many of us lead active, engaged lives, and have plenty of self-discipline - often more, because I have to think, really think about everything that goes in my mouth - otherwise I'll metabolize it WAY too efficiently.

As to the issue of my "desirability," (to quote the not-so-nice doctor in question who told his patient that her obese husband would die of his obesity, leaving her an undesirable candidate for re-marriage) I am NOT married to an obese person. He is tall, dark and handsome - well-preserved for his age, and he is still very open about his physical attraction to me. He tells me that he thinks of me during his work day, that he loves the feel of me under his hands - in short, that I am desirable. As for the singles market...I don't think I need my doctor to assess my hypothetical chances there. I need him or her to assess my health.

Do I think Dr. Feelgood should be sued and lose his license? No. But he DOES deserve to show up on national TV with "A**hat" written all over him. And he did.

[faeryguinevere.livejournal.com]

I'm really of two minds about this (and I didn't see the news story on TV, only the article linked above, so I can't speak to the doctor's "bedside manner" so to speak).

Several years ago, I was overweight. I kind of was aware of it, but I wasn't paying much attention. I was carrying much too much weight for my height, genetics, and frame. I was 21 and was going to the doctor because I had high blood pressure. At 21, I shouldn't have had high blood pressure. There were no real causes for my blood pressure to be high. The doctor asked me to reduce my salt, change my birth control pills, etc. all of which I did, and still saw no results. He said that the problem might be weight related, but he didn't push it. I rather ignored him on that front. I tried the other solutions and didn't have any good results in reducing my blood pressure.

Not long after that, I independently decided I should (and could) lose weight. After about 2 years of very hard work, careful eating and consistant exercise, I had lost about 60 lbs and was much healthier. Guess what else was better? Of course, my blood pressure. It was well within the normal range for someone in her early 20s with no other health conditions.

So even though I didn't go to the doctor to talk about weight, it really was the source of my problem. It was well within the scope of his professional obligations to talk with me about it. It impacted many areas of my life and health, not just my blood pressure.

I guess that the doctor featured in the story above may not have had the best delivery (some doctors aren't good at that sort of thing, sadly), but may have been doing his best as a health care professional to help his patient increase her health levels and quality of life.

Was he right to talk with her about it? Or should have have addressed her other health concerns without talking about the weight, since she didn't bring it up, even though it may have impacted the other problems she was having? It's really hard to say what the 'right' answer is in this case.