Certain points that are useful to make after my last entry

[pegkerr]

1. We do operate under the you-must-at-least-try it rule.

2. Delia is very interested in cooking and has been talking with her vegetarian friends and taking out books on vegetarianism. We have bought cookbooks for her and let her try to plan meals and mess around in the kitchen.

3. I don't short order cook if they reject what I have offered. If they want something else, they make it themselves.

4. I do try to accommodate food preferences/food rejections.

5. This gets frustrating because the list of food preferences/food rejections seems to be growing exponentially.

6. I do, however, cook and serve stuff even when it has been rejected previously, so they have multiple chances to try it.

7. I do not throw away most food that gets rejected. Usually I will save it and eat it later myself. Yesterday's meal was an exception, because it didn't seem to be condusive to re-heating: if I warmed up the meal to heat up the sauce, the spinach and avocado would not be improved.

8. Delia is, actually, my least picky eater. She does, however, seem to be going through an unusually bad rejecting-food period.

9. I should have probably said on my last entry that I was not asking for advice. I was just more or less venting.

10. It especially is not helpful, after a night like I had last night, to tell me "you're doing this wrong" (e.g., being too accommodating/being wasteful by throwing away food/not letting Delia cook/trying too hard).

11. I am a good cook, dammit.

12. And a healthy and experimental eater.

13. This would probably be a lot easier if my husband would back me up. But he doesn't. He is the pickiest one of all. Everything that I have read says that kids generally follow the father's food preferences. I don't know why.

14. As minnehaha K. has pointed out, the girls have been tested, and they are supertasters.

15. I know that it is likely that the girls will become braver about eating different foods as they grow up. I am trying to be patient.

16. My "bitchy" icon is getting just about the most use it has ever gotten this week. In fact, it seems to be stuck in the permanently "on" position.

17. No, I am not asking for advice. But I still love you all anyway.

Comments

[madlori.livejournal.com]

No advice here. I'm just impressed with how much of an effort you make.

[peacockharpy.livejournal.com]

Everything that I have read says that kids generally follow the father's food preferences. I don't know why.

This totally explains Meg's love for all things white and creamy...

[tiellan.livejournal.com]

My experience is the opposite, I followed my mom's food-pickiness. Maybe I'm just weird. My own suspicion is that kids follow whoever shows the most passion for a particular thing. (E.g., how quickly kids learn to cuss if the yhear you say anything more colorful than "damn" even once, with any passion.)

[mjryan.livejournal.com]

I don't short order cook if they reject what I have offered. If they want something else, they make it themselves.

Same here. I make dinner and they have to at least try it. If they don't like it, they can make themselves something. The key for me is not to be bitchy about their distaste when I make stuff that they liked the week before but somehow this week they don't like it. I guess we could eat tacos and spaghetti every day for the rest of our lives...

My four year old will try anything whereas my seven year old is much more "there's no way I'm eating that" and then broods because the world isn't revolving around him. :)

[tassie-gal.livejournal.com]

Just popping in to say **HUGS** and I reckon you rock.

[cakmpls.livejournal.com]

I know. When we first got together, J wouldn't eat onions. ONIONS! How can a person cook without onions? Over the years, though, he has accepted green onions (scallions) in cooking. And he doesn't like spicy (and that's "spicy" by Minnesota standards.)

The kids haven't taken after him; they have their own weirdnesses preferences. Growing up, B wouldn't eat any vegetable except corn and potatoes, and once in a while peas, and wouldn't eat anything spicy. E didn't like most things that contain hamburger (except hamburgers), and wanted everything unbuttered and salad undressed. (Healthy, yes, but we had to remember to remove her portion.) B liked my lasagna, but not my enchiladas; P loved the enchiladas, but wasn't crazy about the lasagna (however, P would pretty much eat anything). And R...don't let me start.

However, things improve, as you say you know they will. Super-picky B is now the one who eats eels and duck's blood soup when he travels. E has been feeding herself most of the time since she started working at 16. R cooks for herself when she doesn't like what J or I am making, and sometimes cooks for all of us (mixed results, but hey, someone else cooked it!). And she loved haggis in Scotland! P continues to be easy to feed.

And the biggest change of all: J now will eat something that is cooked with regular onions in it if the onions remain in big enough chunks so that he can avoid them completely in eating. We take our victories where we find them ...

[tiellan.livejournal.com]

"ONIONS! How can a person cook without onions?"

Hee. I hated onions until after I got married. Now I call them yum-yums. :)

[windelina.livejournal.com]

Hang in there. I was a terribly picky eater as a child (I lived on peanut butter sandwiches and cheerios without milk). Now I'm pretty adventurous when it comes to food!
Just wanted you to hear from a former picky eater that I feel your pain and I know how much it meant to me to have an understanding and adaptable mother when I was a kid.

[rain-girl-ak.livejournal.com]

No advice here. I'm absolutely in awe of your patience and understanding, not only with your kids, but with your husband, too. I've said it before, but you are the mother that I strive to be.

[naomikritzer]

Well, you know, what you REALLY ought to be doing is...

::ducks:: Kidding!

I swear, you attract more well-meaning advice than anyone else I know.

Oh, oh, I just had another idea. What you REALLY ought to do is, go on that show "Wife Swap." Let some other mother deal with your picky eaters for a week on national TV. ::nods sagely:: Maybe they'd fix you up with vegan granola-eaters who'd say, "oh my GOSH, cumin-rutabaga soup with broccoli puree, my FAVORITE," and restore your culinary self-esteem. (Your cooking sounds excellent, honestly. If, in your copious free time, you came over here and cooked for us for a week, everyone here would eat your food and enjoy it.) (Now, see, that's what you REALLY ought to do. Just abandon your family to their unadorned pasta and spend your evenings traveling from house to house among your friends in the Twin Cities area, cooking for appreciative audiences...)

(Hopefully tone is coming through and you don't think any of this "advice" is serious. :-) )

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

You made me laugh, which is what I needed most of all. Thanks.

[bethynyc.livejournal.com]

*hugs* love you! *sends food love karma your way*

[kiwiria.livejournal.com]

I promise to do my best not to give advice unless you specifically ask for it in the future!

*hugs*

[ckd]

Luckily for me, I was able to avoid Geek Answer Syndrome on this one simply by being totally clueless in the area.

Therefore, all I will offer is hope that things will improve in the near future.

[febobe.livejournal.com]

*HUGS*

[dreadmouse.livejournal.com]

Heck, we love you too.

My daughter should be really easy to feed: "Oh, you don't feel like breast milk today? How about we try it in a bottle? No? Well, maybe with a different nipple?"

It's all about the presentation, because there aren't any choices to be made yet. I'm enjoying the simplicity and the lack of cooking.)

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

breast milk . . . It's all about the presentation . . ."

This made me crack up. But then I have an evil mind like that.

[archmage45.livejournal.com]

I didn't offer any advice last time because I didn't really have anything to offer that hadn't already been said....

However...

Should you ever want to cook dinner for tigergladys and I, we will be sure to clear our plates! That sounded fantastic!

I am amazed at the effort and patience you exhibit. Whatever else, you are a fantastic role model for your daughters, and for everyone who reads of your deeds.

Good luck!

[tigergladys.livejournal.com]

Exactly. You describe the most mouthwatering things - I'd eat your cooking anytime!

[aome.livejournal.com]

I think I must always say the wrong thing. :( But I definitely believe that you're a good cook!

Everything that I have read says that kids generally follow the father's food preferences.

Really? I wonder if that only pertains to intact households, or those where the kids spend at least equal time under each parents' roof. I definitely like some of the things my dad eats, but mostly I follow my mom's tastes (having spent most of my time with her).

[misia.livejournal.com]

No advice (your kids would starve at my house!), just sayin' that if you should happen to find yourself in Baltimore/DC, say the word and we'll restaurant-hop with some of the most adventurous eaters it has been my pleasure to get to know.

[ceelee.livejournal.com]

Your icon is beautiful!

[mayakda.livejournal.com]

Ooh, thanks for the supertaster test link! I must try it.

[wilfulcait.livejournal.com]

Perhaps someone who knows how to do these things can make you a "Just Venting" icon.

Good luck on the food journey. If Delia follows through and uses this as a chance to learn to cook, she'll make her life easier (I got my kid to learn to cook by pointing out how popular she'd be if she was the only one in the college dorm with homemade lasagna).

[hillarygayle.livejournal.com]

I'm here via xnera and based on this post I think I'm in love with you. I have just posted my own rant today on unwanted/non-useful advice (in the lingo of the hyperemesis gravidarum forums, we call it "crackering"), and Karen pointed me over here to read yours.

Would you mind if I friended you?

[pegkerr.livejournal.com]

Sure, friend away, and welcome to my journal.

[snippy]

Food. Just one of the many areas in which I realized that I can't control my kids' choices as much as I'd like.

I empathize with your frustration in trying to feed your kids. Good on you both for trying so hard and doing it so well!

[amethistdolphin.livejournal.com]

Can't be easy to deal with three picky eaters, my mom had the hardest time just with me. You are an incredible mom!

[coffeeandink.livejournal.com]

I have no advice. I am just impressed at all the constraints on you, since my mother basically continued to cook exactly like she'd always done even after my sister and I were diagnosed with (nondangerous!) food allergies to various ingrediencts; if we didn't like it, we rummaged among leftovers on our own.

~~this *is not* advice~~

[ceelee.livejournal.com]

I mentioned to a friend at work about your concerns. She is a vegetarian and she suggested Snicker Snack bars to help meet protein requirements. She said they are really tasty and have lots of protein.
cheers,
Claueia

[woodrunner.livejournal.com]

My apologies, I wasn't criticizing. I understand that this is a difficult transition period for the whole family with regards to eating - I have been there myself with a spouse who doesn't eat bleached flour products (and this happened after a grocery trip with a pasta-heavy menu.. d'oh!) and with me being vegetarian...

[aerden.livejournal.com]

Peg--Oh dear! I'm sorry about that, then. :) It's annoying to get a nournal full of advice that you don't want.

I have to say, though--the avocadoes and spinach made me want to come over to your house for dinner. My husband dislikes both of those vegetables, and I love them. I miss my Mom's table so much.

Chantal