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Apr. 26th, 2005
Where is your heart?
Apr. 26th, 2005 10:37 pmI have been feeling strongly Elinor Dashwood-like lately, a feeling of outer reserve plastered over an interior sense of--well, never mind.
What is inside isn't pleasant. But I feel incapable of talking about it. So I feel tongue-tied and dull in this journal. Urgh.
I'm continuing to exercise (I did a mile and a half on the elliptical, beside the karate class today), but am also resorting to an unusual amount of unhealthy eating, sort of in a seeking-comfort-temper-tantrum kind of way: I'm pissed at my body for refusing to lose weight, despite all my efforts, and so the last three days, I've been like, screw it, I'll eat crap. This is really rather uncharacteristic of me. (Sign of stress?)
Perhaps I'll feel a little closer to normal in a day or two. Be patient with me, please, and I'll try to be patient with myself.
What is inside isn't pleasant. But I feel incapable of talking about it. So I feel tongue-tied and dull in this journal. Urgh.
I'm continuing to exercise (I did a mile and a half on the elliptical, beside the karate class today), but am also resorting to an unusual amount of unhealthy eating, sort of in a seeking-comfort-temper-tantrum kind of way: I'm pissed at my body for refusing to lose weight, despite all my efforts, and so the last three days, I've been like, screw it, I'll eat crap. This is really rather uncharacteristic of me. (Sign of stress?)
Perhaps I'll feel a little closer to normal in a day or two. Be patient with me, please, and I'll try to be patient with myself.
