Setting Goals
Aug. 19th, 2008 12:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pegkerrWhat with the 100 pushup challenge, I've been thinking about the goals I have in my life, and the progress I'm making toward them. I'm a Myers-Briggs ENFJ, and the "J" means that I'm into goals, schedules, structures (unlike my husband, who in contrast is a "P" go-with-the-flow sort of guy. A frequent source of, shall we say, not seeing eye-to-eye on things in our marriage).
I like setting goals for myself. I respond well to them, for the most part. Sometimes, however, I get frustrated with myself because I am not making the progress I would like. Sometimes that is due to the goal I have in mind isn't very realistic; sometimes I sabotage myself--mildly. Sometimes real life gets in the way (i.e., Rob's job loss has been a set back in a number of different areas).
Money
Get out of debt: I became extremely unhappy with our debt level when Rob was still at CompUSA, and we are trying to get out. Obviously, two job losses have not helped, but we are trying. For one thing, I have said no more credit cards and we are really doing our best to stick to this resolve. Other things we've done: developed the arrangement with sensei so that we're bartering cleaning/taking pictures at the belt tests so that we don't have to pay tuition (the karate scholarship, of course, helped enormously too; shout out thank you! to the donor). I'm riding my bike to save money on transportation costs. I'm using the Internet aggressively to cut shopping costs, i.e., always Googling for coupon codes when I buy anything on line, using the Payment Protectr program, etc. And obviously, doing our best to cut all the little costs: making coffee instead of buying it, cutting back on entertainment and dining out costs, etc.
Build an emergency fund: It's interesting, balancing this goal with the get out of debt goal. Having an emergency fund is a great way to keep yourself from spending on credit cards, since a lot of people resort to them when life's little emergencies happen. Like (to pick a TOTALLY random example) totaling your car. We decided to put $1000 in the fund to start and then concentrate on debt reduction. This all changed when Rob lost his job (the second time) because suddenly, that emergency fund was (partially) what we had to live on when the unemployment runs out. Obviously, hope for the best, plan for the worst. So now our strategy is, save every penny we can, continue making all (minimum) debt payments (which we are doing) and shove all the rest into savings, so that we can tide ourselves over as long as possible. When Rob gets a job again, I hope to slowly build this fund up to be about three to six months of our living expenses, while continually to aggressively pay down debt.
Saving for retirement: Good news: I started earlier than some Americans have, and I'm doing better than the national average.
Bad news: I'm still not saving enough to fund the kind of retirement I want. Rob, on the other hand, started much too late and his employment history hasn't helped. He has waaaaaayyyyy too little saved and says he doesn't think he can ever retire. And with the job losses, I've had to cut back my own contribution. I hope to jack up my contribution rate again once he finds work, and I will urge him to increase his rate, too. I probably will have to work until at least the age of seventy, and find part time work after that. I definitely worry that I haven't saved enough. We should get long-term care insurance, too, at least for Rob, who is over the age of fifty, but we can't afford it now. Hopefully that is another thing we can address when he gets a job.
Saving for college: Good news: I've been saving since Fiona was two and Delia was born. Bad news: not enough. Not enough for even one year of tuition, which is infuriating and scary. And I stopped altogether when Rob lost his job the first time. I'm super worried about this. I want the girls to be able to go to college, and to come out of it without being saddled with crippling debt. I plan to search VERY AGGRESSIVELY for scholarships. I plan to start looking into this in the coming year. Getting our general debt load lower would help us on this goal, too, since it would open up our cash flow.
European vacation: We talked about this last summer, about going as a family before the girls went off to college. Unfortunately, the job losses have torpedoed any progress we could make toward this goal. It's a pity; I LOVED my time in Europe as a college student, and I really want the girls to experience it, too. Rob hasn't been to Europe and doesn't feel nearly as strongly about it as me. I think the fact that we also want to go to some of the upcoming Harry Potter conferences (Azkatraz, and the one at Universal the year after that) will be a conflicting goal. Lord, we're not made of money.
Fitness
Black Belt: This is a very long-term goal; I probably have another year and a half to two years to go. It's great to be able to share it with my daughters, and I feel good that I'm modeling good behavior to them by working on it. Working toward this goal means keeping fit, being able to defend myself, keeping strong, feeling confident, fighting a rear guard action on the aging of my body, discipline, doing something challenging, doing something fun.
Losing Weight: Sparkpeople.com has helped a lot on this. I still would like to lose about ten pounds (I'm down fifteen from my peak). I was most pleased with my body when I was 126 pounds, but I had a LOT less muscle then, and muscle is heavier than fat, so it's not realistic. I was satisfied with my body when I was 137 pounds. I'm now 149.5, and I hope to get down to 140. It is really, really hard to lose that last ten pounds. I'm living a very active lifestyle, and I'm doing a little better than I was doing even six months ago in watching my portion sizes. Still, although I am trying hard, I am not sure I will be able to reach that number.
Getting Healthier in General: I'm doing a lot toward working toward this goal. Again, Sparkpeople.com has really helped. I have "streaks" going: how many weeks in a row can I bicycle at least three times a week? How many weeks in a row can I pack a homemade lunch at least four times a week? How many weeks in a row can I take my multivitamin every day? Karate helps, as does the bicycling. I am not doing enough weightlifting, and I'm a little frustrated that I'm not improving my cardio stamina or flexibility as much as I would like. The 100 pushups challenge should help me tone and gain strangth. I am constantly trying to eat healthier, too. It's too bad that my family isn't very cooperative in eating the healthy meals I try to cook.
I have been pushing Rob on this goal a bit, too, because he has said he wants to lose weight and I think he really needs it. He doesn't want to lose it enough, however, to willingly give up several bad habits: drinking Coke, eating leftovers off the girls plates, and snacking on cheddar cheese at night. *Sigh* I'm trying to be encouraging without being a nag. It's a delicate balancing act.
Other
Spiritual: I'm on the church council, so I've been thinking about this. I feel I have been rather vague about developing myself in this area.
Emotional (Avoiding depression): Continue the walks on the Stone Arch Bridge to give me exercise/sunlight. Keep taking meds. Keep checking in with my support team. Play iPod playlists (Holy Tree playlist, Winter playlist, Hope playlist) as needed.
Parenting: Keep tabs on the girls. Get them to appointments, karate lessons. Continue to work on the fostering independence project, especially with Fiona (college in three years! Oy!) Keep checking on how their school work is going.
Secret project: This is one I'm keeping very close to my vest and I'm not ready to talk about it yet. Um, I'm taking a small step each day, trying to develop/work myself up to the point that I can work toward something that is important to me. Sorry if that's vague, but it's the most I can say right now. So far, I'm doing the goal every day, although I don't have much to show for it yet. Right now, it is just the practice (rather than the result) which is important. I'm trying to be patient with myself
What are some of your goals?
I like setting goals for myself. I respond well to them, for the most part. Sometimes, however, I get frustrated with myself because I am not making the progress I would like. Sometimes that is due to the goal I have in mind isn't very realistic; sometimes I sabotage myself--mildly. Sometimes real life gets in the way (i.e., Rob's job loss has been a set back in a number of different areas).
Money
Get out of debt: I became extremely unhappy with our debt level when Rob was still at CompUSA, and we are trying to get out. Obviously, two job losses have not helped, but we are trying. For one thing, I have said no more credit cards and we are really doing our best to stick to this resolve. Other things we've done: developed the arrangement with sensei so that we're bartering cleaning/taking pictures at the belt tests so that we don't have to pay tuition (the karate scholarship, of course, helped enormously too; shout out thank you! to the donor). I'm riding my bike to save money on transportation costs. I'm using the Internet aggressively to cut shopping costs, i.e., always Googling for coupon codes when I buy anything on line, using the Payment Protectr program, etc. And obviously, doing our best to cut all the little costs: making coffee instead of buying it, cutting back on entertainment and dining out costs, etc.
Build an emergency fund: It's interesting, balancing this goal with the get out of debt goal. Having an emergency fund is a great way to keep yourself from spending on credit cards, since a lot of people resort to them when life's little emergencies happen. Like (to pick a TOTALLY random example) totaling your car. We decided to put $1000 in the fund to start and then concentrate on debt reduction. This all changed when Rob lost his job (the second time) because suddenly, that emergency fund was (partially) what we had to live on when the unemployment runs out. Obviously, hope for the best, plan for the worst. So now our strategy is, save every penny we can, continue making all (minimum) debt payments (which we are doing) and shove all the rest into savings, so that we can tide ourselves over as long as possible. When Rob gets a job again, I hope to slowly build this fund up to be about three to six months of our living expenses, while continually to aggressively pay down debt.
Saving for retirement: Good news: I started earlier than some Americans have, and I'm doing better than the national average.
Bad news: I'm still not saving enough to fund the kind of retirement I want. Rob, on the other hand, started much too late and his employment history hasn't helped. He has waaaaaayyyyy too little saved and says he doesn't think he can ever retire. And with the job losses, I've had to cut back my own contribution. I hope to jack up my contribution rate again once he finds work, and I will urge him to increase his rate, too. I probably will have to work until at least the age of seventy, and find part time work after that. I definitely worry that I haven't saved enough. We should get long-term care insurance, too, at least for Rob, who is over the age of fifty, but we can't afford it now. Hopefully that is another thing we can address when he gets a job.
Saving for college: Good news: I've been saving since Fiona was two and Delia was born. Bad news: not enough. Not enough for even one year of tuition, which is infuriating and scary. And I stopped altogether when Rob lost his job the first time. I'm super worried about this. I want the girls to be able to go to college, and to come out of it without being saddled with crippling debt. I plan to search VERY AGGRESSIVELY for scholarships. I plan to start looking into this in the coming year. Getting our general debt load lower would help us on this goal, too, since it would open up our cash flow.
European vacation: We talked about this last summer, about going as a family before the girls went off to college. Unfortunately, the job losses have torpedoed any progress we could make toward this goal. It's a pity; I LOVED my time in Europe as a college student, and I really want the girls to experience it, too. Rob hasn't been to Europe and doesn't feel nearly as strongly about it as me. I think the fact that we also want to go to some of the upcoming Harry Potter conferences (Azkatraz, and the one at Universal the year after that) will be a conflicting goal. Lord, we're not made of money.
Fitness
Black Belt: This is a very long-term goal; I probably have another year and a half to two years to go. It's great to be able to share it with my daughters, and I feel good that I'm modeling good behavior to them by working on it. Working toward this goal means keeping fit, being able to defend myself, keeping strong, feeling confident, fighting a rear guard action on the aging of my body, discipline, doing something challenging, doing something fun.
Losing Weight: Sparkpeople.com has helped a lot on this. I still would like to lose about ten pounds (I'm down fifteen from my peak). I was most pleased with my body when I was 126 pounds, but I had a LOT less muscle then, and muscle is heavier than fat, so it's not realistic. I was satisfied with my body when I was 137 pounds. I'm now 149.5, and I hope to get down to 140. It is really, really hard to lose that last ten pounds. I'm living a very active lifestyle, and I'm doing a little better than I was doing even six months ago in watching my portion sizes. Still, although I am trying hard, I am not sure I will be able to reach that number.
Getting Healthier in General: I'm doing a lot toward working toward this goal. Again, Sparkpeople.com has really helped. I have "streaks" going: how many weeks in a row can I bicycle at least three times a week? How many weeks in a row can I pack a homemade lunch at least four times a week? How many weeks in a row can I take my multivitamin every day? Karate helps, as does the bicycling. I am not doing enough weightlifting, and I'm a little frustrated that I'm not improving my cardio stamina or flexibility as much as I would like. The 100 pushups challenge should help me tone and gain strangth. I am constantly trying to eat healthier, too. It's too bad that my family isn't very cooperative in eating the healthy meals I try to cook.
I have been pushing Rob on this goal a bit, too, because he has said he wants to lose weight and I think he really needs it. He doesn't want to lose it enough, however, to willingly give up several bad habits: drinking Coke, eating leftovers off the girls plates, and snacking on cheddar cheese at night. *Sigh* I'm trying to be encouraging without being a nag. It's a delicate balancing act.
Other
Spiritual: I'm on the church council, so I've been thinking about this. I feel I have been rather vague about developing myself in this area.
Emotional (Avoiding depression): Continue the walks on the Stone Arch Bridge to give me exercise/sunlight. Keep taking meds. Keep checking in with my support team. Play iPod playlists (Holy Tree playlist, Winter playlist, Hope playlist) as needed.
Parenting: Keep tabs on the girls. Get them to appointments, karate lessons. Continue to work on the fostering independence project, especially with Fiona (college in three years! Oy!) Keep checking on how their school work is going.
Secret project: This is one I'm keeping very close to my vest and I'm not ready to talk about it yet. Um, I'm taking a small step each day, trying to develop/work myself up to the point that I can work toward something that is important to me. Sorry if that's vague, but it's the most I can say right now. So far, I'm doing the goal every day, although I don't have much to show for it yet. Right now, it is just the practice (rather than the result) which is important. I'm trying to be patient with myself
What are some of your goals?
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-20 02:45 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2008-08-20 02:19 pm (UTC)